This is a sad, but happy/thankful post to all of you who have sent me helpful and caring posts.
"when" happened.
caution
caution
When Becky came over and saw Sara on the floor unable to get up, and pushing away yummy food with her nose and refusing to even sniff dried liver bits and a hot dog, she also noticed for the first time in Sara's whole life we could see and touch her ribs. She was always robust and chunky. We called her piglet for 13 years.
Sara was in pain. We could see it in her eyes as she looked at us.
We called many Vets to find out how much euthanasia was. $100 - $190. We tried one 45 miles away and the vet said she would do it for $37. We carried Sara to Becky's car and laid Sara on the back seat. She never moved.
I asked the vet to please check her one more time to see if we could save Sara's life. She said it would not be possible. SHe believed somewhere in Sara's brain and/or spine was damage. Too much and worsening.
The vet let me hold and talk to and pet Sara for almost an hour. Then she attempted to insert a syringe in Sara's hind leg. Sara did not have high enough blood pressure to do so. So a third try was done in her front leg.
As the fluid was injected, I lay across Sara and held her crying and telling her what a wonderful god dog and friend she was to me. Becky cried. The vet was also tearful.
Sara made no sign of struggle or resistance. My arms wrapped around her, and me talking in her ear about all the joy she brought me and how much I was missing her.... and I told her to wait for me, because I, too, am old and ill... and it will be my turn soon. I assured Sara I would come get her sometime soon.
One tiny sigh and she drifted off to sleep. 30 seconds later the vet said Sara had crossed Rainbow Bridge. Becky and I cried more and I kept telling Sara how much I love her. (Just in case she could still hear me.)
The vet folded the fleecey blankie around Sara and told me she had something for me.
She gave me a small bisque colored ceramic heart with a paw print on it... and Sara's name written on the back.
The vet gave us some more time ... and then we had to leave. A woman holding her 12 year old Toy Poodle in the waiting room hugged me as I left.
Becky told me she saw Sara's tail flip a tad as I was talking to her, and when the vet administered the drug, she saw a peaceful expression come over Sara's face and eyes.
I loved that Sara O'Hara that hopped and jumped looking like a marionette made of feathers... that would steal my pillow when I slept giving me a crick in the neck... who could steal trash from my kitchen trash can and only neatly and precisely take he few items she wanted...who never hurt or abandoned me... who comforted me... made me laugh... licked my legs until I'd yell "stoppit!"
She never once chewed anything, or dug, or did really naughty things.
I am thankful I had the priviledge of knowing love and friendship through my retired SD Sara for the 13+ years we were blessed to have each other.
I miss her already. I am happy she is no longer crying to me to stop her hurting.
She looked so very pretty! I had her groomed a week ago. I have kept her collar and tags.
Hugs to all the shoulders offered to to lean on.
Roxie
and Sara and Tay
